Disgraced and disrobed priest, Father Richard Bucci, says he has found a new calling in the world of professional gaming - not as player, but coach of a team of six orphan boys under the age of 13.
In a statement from the team's social media pages, Fr. Bucci said, "The church may not want me but I still hear the Lord bid me do his work. And now, that work is shepherd to a flock of talented lambs who will spread the Word online and off. We will inspire the esports community, so ripe with youthful energy, to follow our lead as we submit our hearts and thumbs to God's will. We are team: Cathoclicks!"
Team Cathoclicks
Work hard. Pray hard.
The Sacred Heart Church in West Warwick where Father Bucci served for 36 years, until recently, said that they do not support his move into the gaming industry and have subsequently revoked his access to the adjoining orphanage from where he supposedly hand-picked his team.
Despite controversy, Father Bucci has built an undeniable force in the industry and is already seeing results with two inter-state titles under their robes.
The team has received a frosty welcome from rival professionals and gaming fans alike. Much of the criticism focuses on the team's proselytizing over the mic during game play. "Its ridiculous, they don't shut up. Imagine having an elite team of Jehovah's chasing you around the map, threatening to shoot unless you accept God."
"My mate @n0sc0pew0k3 said he died and they all gathered round his body and prayed for his salvation."
In January the team was banned from COD for shooting the ten commandments into walls and holding a queer player hostage until he ordered gay conversion therapy from their website.
Father Bucci, speaking on behalf of the boys, responded with an in-game sermon: "So many sports people show their devotion and gratitude to God on the playing field. We should not be ashamed to do the same. Jesus was born offline but He also lives online. Everyone thinks He's only available when you've turned off but He's also there when you're turned on."
As per every gaming session, Father Bucci closed with this image and a prayer:
"I would like everyone to fear two things. God and the Cathoclicks. Amen."
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